Separated, new baby, but still hopeful

[newmama]

My evening highlights...positive signs from WH:

he had seconds of my meal

he cleaned the kitchen after I cooked (used to do this but it has been several months now)

he found some brandy in our cabinet and took it out for me-- I had some for the first time on Thanksgiving mixed with apple cider and had told him how good it was.

he stayed past the time he normally does and we watched a show together

Not so positive:
he said he needs to get the monthly schedule made but hasn't gotten around to it- I just said "Oh" shrugged my shoulders, and changed the subject.

EARLIER today my SIL and MIL came by to visit our boy. They asked how I was doing. I said "good," and explained I know he may still file for D but I am not applying pressure right now and that I am waiting until after the holidays before I implement some more drastic measures.

My SIL says she can't bear to talk to her brother since she wants to wring his neck. BUt she does love him and knows he is just lost right now. Both she and her mother do not talk to him about the A currently and are confident it will end. They say it doesn't seem to matter if they talk to him about it so they are just not saying anything. However, the OW is not welcome in their homes and that was all they told him awhile back.

My SIL is a former BS. Her ex husband divorced her 2.5 years ago, moved in with OW, moved out after 9 months (she kicked him out) and 1 year ago started groveling and asking for my SIL to reconcile. My SIL met someone and was in a relationship at the time. But they broke up. SO in July, her exH asks her again to reconcile....says he wants to marry her all over again. She said only if he was willing to go to counseling and make major changes. So that is what they are doing currently.

My SIL hinted that what caused her ex to really see what he is missing was to learn she was dating someone. I told her that I hear what she's saying, but can't justify dating while we are still technically married. I do think I could do it if he files for D...like that same week. (I started a profile on match.com awhile back just to remind myself that I could still get a guy if I wanted. :-) Like I said in another post, nothing serious, just get back into the dating game and take my mind off of WH.

I know there is risk that some of what I was talking about could get back to my WH. But here is what I said--I was not applying pressure, I don't want to D, I won't sit around doing nothing forever. So if he hears that, it is nothing I haven't already told him. (I did not talk about divorce busting or strategizing, etc.)

Wow, it seems like I have been super focused on this today. Tomorrow I will take a break and do some Christmas shopping!