The Thanksgiving weekend was very nice. I will admit I had and still have some concern over how we will handle the Holidays. The Holidays has been difficult on my W in the past; she is away from her family and the weather up north is a constant reminder that she is nowhere near the tropical climate of her childhood.
[Wednesday] W picked up girls early from daycare and they cooked a traditional Thanksgiving dinner that was ready when I arrived from work. We had a very nice dinner. And after putting girls to bed, the W and I watched "A Roman Holiday". It is one of my favorite classics that my W had not seen yet.
[Thursday] Started off rocky. I do not remember what triggered it, but W had a small bout with depression in the morning. We were finishing some chores before heading to my parents for the weekend and my W just headed up to the room and layed down. She slept for about an hour while D6 and I racked leaves. D3 stayed inside to watch TV. She was much better when she woke up.
We drove to my parents in the afternoon and all enjoyed a traditional Thanksgiving dinner at their place. My parents and W both acted as if nothing had ever happened between us.
[Friday] Girls, W and I drove a couple of hours to see my grandfather who has recently moved to a nursing home. It felt good to give him some company over the weekend.
That night W and I left girls with parents and went out for dinner and a movie. We saw "The Blind Side"; which I would recomend.
[Saturday] Was spent relaxing at my parents place. We put together a gingerbread train, took the girls to the Santa parade and horseback riding (one of the girl favorite things to do when at grandpas).
[Sunday] Sunday started off rocky. We were rushed getting ready for church, which is always a stressor for my W. However, what really "freaked" (my W's word) my W out was when the pastor that married us walked into the sanctuary. This was unexpected as he is no longer the church's pastor. He is one of the few that I consulted with during the separation and knows "everything". She said that at that point she started thinking of killing herself and that angered her. After church, in her hurry to leave, she got angry at D6; and that only frustrated her more. When we go back to my parents place; she went into the our room and locked the door. About an hour later, she came back out and it was as if nothing happened.
The girls were especially trying on the drive back home. The 2 were tired and tantrumy for the entire 4 hour trip. I was driving and W was the one that was attempting to keep them calm (an impossible task). Finally, about 2 1/2 hours into the trip, W screamed "Ya! Yaaaaa!" (for thoe of you that are not fluent in Spanish it can be loosley translated into "Enough already") This not only startled the girls, it also made me jump. This caused D3 to start crying "Mommy, you scared me". My W went quiet and her eyes teared up. Not knowing exactly what to say or do, I just drove for probably 5 minutes in silence. D3's cries went from a cry to a wimper during that time. Finally, trying to help I said "You are only human. I think you are too hard on yourself." She did not say anything.
After about another 5 minutes, she spoke: W: "I just lost it. She (D3) knows how to push every button I have." M: "I would have been close to losing it too, if I hadn't already. You have the more difficult job of the two of us. You are welcome to drive if you would rather." W: "I can't drive in this weather. I can't see." M: "I really appreciate you handling them the way you are." ...
The drive improved some from there, but after another 45 minutes I made an attempt to get the girls to sleep some: M: "Hey girls. It's bedtime, would you like to say your prayers and take a nap?" D3: "I will say the prayer."
Now I was expecting her to say the normal nighttime prayer that we always say together, but she surprised both W and I by making up her own:
D3: "Dear God, Thank you for our trip to grandpa's Thank you for horseback riding Thank you for us watching TV Thank you for grandma Thank you for going to church Thank you for Jesus And thank you for going back home Amen Thank you God"
It was our tantrumy 3 yr old that reminded us what the weekend was about. The rest of the evening was enjoyable for all.
