Ohh, and until then, any time I would say something, "I was being dramatic trying to make him feel guilty"...
I heard the same thing.
...which was code for "I feel guilty" or "stop messing with my game" or "if I'm lucky enough to not see it, let's pretend it's not there cuz that's easier for me" or any number of possibilities.
Doesn't matter. What action, barring either undoing the past or reconciling can the WAS take to fix the problem (pain and trauma inflicted on the kids)? If they don't see an action they can take, they don't want to think about it. We all do this in many ways, often healthy, control the things we can and accept the things we can't. In this case it is contorted.
