I need help please

[P17]

He is ending the call first - I think I would like to change that from the next conversation on.

Ending the contact first (whether it's call, text, email or face to face) is the best way to do it, if possible (and it's not always possible). It gives you strength and it shows the WAS that YOU are on control not them. That may sound daft for just a quick phone call, but it does work.

We chat about lots of things - work, his new appartment, our kids, our house, sport, finances. When he started to tell me he was unhappy with me in April these conversations were a real drag - honestly it was like talking to en empty fridge - he didn't say 2 words - it's so much more relaxed now.

Somebody once said to me that the reason W and I were so relaxed around one another is that the pressure was taken out of the situation when she left (this was prior to OM moving in).

I wouldn't read much into it. It's a good sign but it's nothing more than that.

He even gave me the address to his new appartment - you might think this is weird but you see I had a PI set on him on his last one and I didn't think he would give me the new address but he did.

That one I can relate to. W said before she left that she didn't want any contact from me at all, then said she did, then gave me her home number and then recently her email address! I saw it as clinging especially as she gave me her home number in a very roundabout way.

I don't know what to make of W doing this, although it seems a bit suspicious. Your H's intentions in doing that could be good. But then again maybe he just wants you to forward mail onto him.

Don't read too much into it without further proof.

We don't have any relationship talk at all which is the way I think is the best right now - one of the reasons he felt he couldn't reconcile was that I would hold his "friendships/affairs" forever over his head and he didn't want to live like that

No R talk is good. Show how that you are a safe place to return to. No accusations. No shouting. No blame. Just give him a safe-ish (not too safe that it turns into cake eating) place to land when he wants to come back.

I had many angry/ emotional outbursts and they are now gone for the last 2 months - I am not sure if his bahaviour has something to do with it.

Having somebody be angry at you is not a safe place to return to. He will have noticed you had stopped that. They do notice things. They just don't tell you about it. All human nature.

It's hard not to get your hopes up though as he is changing more and more - even the conversations with the kids are getting better, not great but better.

It's all good stuff. However don't push too soon. Let HIM come back to YOU.