Glad you have a smile!!! But honestly, I NEVER have issues w/him wanting to go do something. I do. I think it's fair. And, I think it's good for him. Just an explanation.
I like the result!!!
Me-46, D-21, S15, S13
After many years w/my head in the sand... I FILED Divorced 6/2011
The average woman would rather have beauty than brains, because the average man can see better than he can think.
For what it's worth, I think Greek's reply is a bit too pushy. It will put pressure on him and cause him to back away. Here's my interpretation of it:
"Hey H, something is bothering me and it's my responsibility to let you know, rather that stuffing it until I cannot talk reasonably about it."
Right now he is stressed about something. You telling him something is bothering you will make him feel you're about to dump more problems onto him. RESULT: Barriers come up.
When you _____, I feel _____.
When he hears this he thinks, "See, it's all my fault! I can't do anything right! All she does is b*tch and complain."
It would help me and I could address your concerns much better if you talked to me rather than letting resentment/anger build up in your delivery.
He triggers, "Arrggh!!! Those words again..."
M:11 | T:12 | Status: Married 4C's of WAS communication: Cool, Calm, Collected and CONFIDENT
Thanks for the support! I'm livin' large right now... Hangin' by the fire in the pub, watching what I want to on TV, and catching up on all the work I missed while down with pneumonia! I'm loving it.
Me-46, D-21, S15, S13
After many years w/my head in the sand... I FILED Divorced 6/2011
The average woman would rather have beauty than brains, because the average man can see better than he can think.
Mindfull, it is delightful and impreesive, following along. You got it down (i know, I know: you have days...we all do). Although your "Yep" is working real well, I think you should expand your repertoire:
I NEVER have issues w/him wanting to go do something. I do. I think it's fair. And, I think it's good for him. Just an explanation.
MF, I hear you and I didn't think any different.
However don't forget, at this point in time, it's what he thinks that counts. Him going to play poker is what he wanted to do, but he felt that it was his obligation to be home with his family. A possible reason is because he is away from home so much. So his own guilt/conscience trapped him.
Thanks for sharing on the conversation. I'd like to think about it a bit before I comment... and need to go out, so don't hold your breath.
M:11 | T:12 | Status: Married 4C's of WAS communication: Cool, Calm, Collected and CONFIDENT
