I had a moment today. Okay two moments. But apart from that I am doing well.
I went out last night and was hit on by a guy who complimented me on my fabulous figure. Okay, so he was drunk but he wasn't blind and he had damned good taste if I say so myself. LOL.
So, keeping it together today. Going out later with friends. I am setting out the path that I want to tread. 2010 will not be a repeat of 09. Things will move up from here for me.
There are a lot of things in my sitch I have seen as obstacles but they are really opportunities. One that just occured to me is that I have the opportunity to entertain a lot while H is out. I will be holding a lot more parties and dinners next year. I plan to really enjoy my home.
I am also thinking of taking up a belly dancing course I have been interested in. But I already have yoga classes and a running schedule, so I am not sure about fitting that one in...
how about dating.... I don't think he's excited about you because to him you are easy, he can have you at anytime and currently he's pursuing something more exciting.
If you were to start dating, that might change this dynamic drastically....
I went out last night and was hit on by a guy who complimented me on my fabulous figure. Okay, so he was drunk but he wasn't blind and he had damned good taste if I say so myself. LOL.
Kara, I know nothing about your sitch or you, but you gave me a well needed belly laugh today! Hahaha This was the best!
Me-46, D-21, S15, S13
After many years w/my head in the sand... I FILED Divorced 6/2011
The average woman would rather have beauty than brains, because the average man can see better than he can think.
Well, MF, it was kinda funny. The first guy I saw when I walked in with my friends was Drunk Guy. Who zoomed in on me like a laser beam.
SP/Gardener,thanks for checking in. I was interested in hearing a man's perspective on the conversation.
Robx, if I started dating it would be a 10 on the Richter Scale and a 5 on the Saffir Simpson scale. One day my H came home to find a black low slung sports car in his spot in the garage and me in the foyer talking to a 6ft tall hunk, the driver of the said sports car. Sports car guy was actually the owner of a carpet installation business and had come by to drop off a quotation. I had never met the guy before. Well, he parked in the garage in H's spot and I said to him you shouldn't park in my H's spot but I guess it is ok for a few minutes. Who turned up two minutes later? Yep, H. He gave Sports Car Guy the most evil look I have ever seen and was not a happy camper even after SCG's most profuse apologies. Imagine if I started dating!!!
Yes, H thinks I am easy and that is why there is no challenge, no interest. He KNEW exactly how I felt because I revealed my hand of cards. I TOLD him how I felt one too many times. I TAUGHT him to treat me like this. It is time to "UN-TEACH" him. Not through words but through deeds. My cards will now be held close to my chess and I don't plan on raising any R talk because I am through with that. I have said all that needs to be said.
Dating,no for so many reasons. Social interaction, yes.
God, another funny from your thread... We had this carpet installer guy, and my BFF (used to live next door to each other), came over when he was there twice, and used to throw stuff on the floor (looking like an accident) to make him bend over in front of us! Hahaha OMy! (PS - He had a sh*tty car, though!)
BTW, I saw your note on my thread. Look through my beginning threads (under MindBlank, not MindFull) to get the info you were after... We're navigating a little rougher waters now that I'm done being the one you speak of in your last paragraph above!!
Me-46, D-21, S15, S13
After many years w/my head in the sand... I FILED Divorced 6/2011
The average woman would rather have beauty than brains, because the average man can see better than he can think.
First of all, kudos to you for taking a stand. My sitch is a little different, but I also recently decided that I have done everything that I can and am leaving the rest up to the God.
I don't have any advice for you regarding H's return. Not knowing your full sitch, my intitial reaction is WTF. How did you handle his return?
Me & H: 33 yrs S: 4 & 6 D: 2 M: 9 yrs ILYBNILWY: 8/09 SEPARATED: 9/09 The Beginning
How did I handle it? Well, I continued with what I was doing and I returned his greeting politely. I knew that he would be back. I just didn't know when.
I don't intend to say anything further. I have said more than enough. There is nothing more to be said by me.
I spent the entire weekend strategizing and have come up with what I think is a winning strategy for me because my uppermost goal now is to be healthy mentally and emotionally. DBing was my obsession for an entire year. My life has been very unbalanced and revolved around H's actions and my reactions despite my best efforts to ensure that it did not. Maybe it is just an acceptance or grieving process I had to go through.
I will handle it and I will handle it well. I have mapped out my plan of who and where I need to be. Instead of hoping that my H falls back in love with me, I am going to fall in love with myself, if that makes sense. I am really going to get me FOR ME. Be confident for ME. Be sexy for ME. Not from an arrogant, selfish or conceited point of view. I just think that this is the way for me to emerge healthy and whole. And by focusing on myself I will cease to focus on my H. I am going to be comitted to myself for once.
