Here's my story..midlife crisis/infidelity

[January girl]

We had a nice Thanksgiving except that he was quite nervous around our friends and family. On Saturday, he was reading a text from a guy friend of ours and he was laughing so I walked up to read over his shoulder and the previous text was from her with a subject of "Me too, darling" I jumped back and thought I was going to throw up right there in the family room. He came over to me and said it was old and showed me the date but covered the message. How can this man who I have given my heart and soul to for so many years be so cold as to hang onto that message? I know he is in our house every night sleeping but it just feels so useless because it feels like she is standing on my front porch waiting for him to walk out. I know I need to focus on us but I am SO sad that I can hardly think straight. We are supposed to put up the tree today but I just want to lay in bed and cry. I know I won't but how do I stop thinking about her????