Deployed Soldier/Father needs your help

[SoldierDad]

Ok, I have some questions if y'all can entertain me.

1. W has said before that I am not welcome in home when I am back for R&R, I WILL be staying in the home-no matter what she says, however, do I tell her this before I get there, or just do it?

2. If there is OM, knowing that I am leaving again in 2 weeks, I will lay the boundary, but how can I enforce it if I am not there?

3. I will be there at Christmas-do I buy W a small gift? Wish her Merry C? She didn't call me on Tgiving, so I am thinking NO.

4. If the idea is to be a strong, confident Alpha male, looking good, smelling good, not over reacting to anything she says or does - how do I pull that off without looking like I am faking it? I know NOTHING about fashion etc. I have the means to buy new clothes-she is used to me in Harley T-shirts, and jeans. What do I buy-LADIES???

5. What do I do, if she just locks me out of the M bedroom? We have locks on the doors. Do I just accept that, or get the key and open the door and go in?

I have more questions, and will post them soon. Thank you all for your help-I am a better man because of all of you.