So . . . . are you still out there? Any news, good or bad?
I'm still here. I think things are still moving in the right direction. Did you read my two new posts (right before yours)? They sort of answer some of the questions you had.
OK, so DH went back to the doctor and he is going to continue with the Testosterone for now. I'm guessing it's because his was so low, plus the fact that he can tell a difference. The doctor said there is no way of knowing if he will need to be on it long term until he starts to go off of it. I asked him again the other day if he could tell a difference and he said yes. This time he seemed more sure. I know there are other factors that have played into his low desire...stressful job, money problems (although those are easing), the loss of several good friends (with another one terminally ill), etc. This is where we are different. When I'm stressed I want more sex, he is the opposite. I find it to be a great stress reliever, among other things.
He does initiate, usually at least twice a week. Before, I probably wouldn't have been satisfied with that, but the AD, as I said before, has dampened my desire somewhat. The other night we just laid next to each other for over an hour, just holding each other, and touching each other. It was amazing.
I think I'm at the point where I need to work on myself more. I've lost about 15 pounds, but have been stalled at my current weight for over a month. I'd like to lose about 15 more. I'm trying to keep myself busy and not constantly analyze and talk to him death. I'm trying to forget about the past, while learing from it. I'm not sure if that makes sense.
I still feel as if I'm needing more from him. I asked him if he would bring me flowers. He said he would. But, I haven't seen any yet. I don't want to pressure him to be something he isn't, yet I want to have my needs and wants met. How do you find that middle ground???? Overall, I am happier. Much happier than I was even a month ago. I do think the AD has reached a new level (if that's possible). It seemed to slowly work it's way into my system; and I'd see small changes in my thinking every few weeks.
How are things going with you SillyOldBear? I hope you are still seeing improvements in your marriage. Thanks for showing interest in my situation and for offering help.
