Is this the end of my marriage?

[P17]

newmama,

Thanks for your message. Considering the mess I was in I am surprised that I could inspire anybody. I will try not to let you down.

NC is incredibly difficult. As I have said many times before it saddens me that after 7 years I will not hear or see my W again. I HAVE to move on though however much it is tearing me apart. I will be okay with or without my wife. Deep down I know that. I am a much stronger person than I thought. This sitch has taught me that.

cutterbug, as newmama said its good to know the vets find this tough too. Lets us know you guys are human too

I had a good but restless sleep last night. I am 300 miles away from home and W. Will see my mum later today.

Sleep has revealed:

1. W may be trying to hurt me with indifference towards mum.

2. She is feeling helpless / out of control in her own life, hence her pushy / aggressive / controlling attitude in her email.

3. She is angry / annoyed at me reiterating to her about NC when she came around on Monday ( her quote that she wanted to discuss my mum on Monday but 'that obviously didnt happen' gives it away).

4. She doesnt believe that I can stop contact and leep up NC.

Finally another revelation. W is keeping OM as lodger and A quiet for a while, probably until work party 18 december) before announcing it properly. That way it looks better.

Thanks again for everybodys support and help.

The