Deployed Soldier/Father needs your help

[bluerain]

You should set boundaries to protect yourself and your kids. If there is an OM, "My children are not to meet this person", "This person is not welcome in the Marital Home". "I am no longer funding your A with marital assets", then cut off the cell phone, internet, car payment, whatever she is using to contact him. "I will not share my wife" or "I will not live in an open marriage".

Those are some pretty common things that people do and say. Is there something that is a deal breaker for you? Something that you absolutely will not abide by? If there is something that you feel very strongly about that is a good boundary because its something that you wont waffle on.

I think that the most common thing that I think of is, dont set her up to lie to you. Which she might try to do. Validate her concerns- you can say that you understand why she feels something without agreeing that shes right.