Wife probably has BPD, I will never have her back

[brknheart]

I am pretty sure my wife has borderline personality disorder, given the various signs ive missed over the years and also the way she has been acting during our separation. She has made it clear that we are done months ago and I found out she is trying to date another man. Given what ive read, dealing with a BPD person is very difficult, even if that person admits they have the problem. My WAS of course thinks nothing is wrong with her (I didn't confront her about BPD) and she doesn't need counseling trough our separation/divorce. After learning about her wanting to date, which we agreed to wait till the divorce is final, I know I will never have "my" wife back again. Being the caring person that I am though, I still feel like I want to help her. I know I cant, so its another part of detachment I need to go through. As most people here know, its very hard, especially when I keep asking myself how can someone I loved so much do such a horrible things to me and others that are close to me. Like most BPDs, she has locked the compartment in her brain that contained everything about me and threw away the key.

Has anyone here dealt with a S with BPD? What was the outcome?