You are doing this because your H is EMOTIONALLY ABUSIVE. Because it costs you and your self-esteem to be in this R. Because you only get one life, and it's time you started living and being healthy.
My guess? You rocked his world to the core because you didn't perform according to his script, so he has to turn it on you. What does H always do? Make it Bunny's fault. Bunny is stupid. Bunny is irresponsible. Bunny is my toy and under my control. When Bunny doesn't do what I want her to or when I'VE screwed up/had a bad day/feel like, I spew all over her.
New Bunny script: "H, I'm sorry you feel that way, but I believe it is all for the best. Yes H, I understand you think I've made a mistake/ruined my kids' lives; I'm sorry you feel that way." Go now and practice saying "I'm sorry you feel that way," 20-times or until it rolls off your tongue.
This is the way your H has controlled you all these years. Go back and reread your threads from start to finish, and THEN tell us you're making a mistake.
SD
Me: 40 H: 43 H had EA from 2/06-9/06 Bomb 5/06 Piecing since 9/2006 3/2008: Boundary setting 7/2009: Boundary crossing~dropped my own bomb. 8/2010: Marriage finally on track!
