SR, Wow! Just catching up with you after, maybe, three weeks and can`t believe things have moved on in your neck of the woods as much as they have.
I know how much you`ve put into DBing but, I believe, the outcome is ALWAYS positive for the DBer whether or not the marriage is saved.
This is mirror time. You`ve looked at you and made all the changes possible for a better you. You`ve learnt to live a fun life with or without your spouse too. You get to keep the new you, you get the keep the fun even if H walks away.
The other thing to remember is that its not over yet. Some H`s need to smell the one bed apartment before they realise hey, the single life is not all its cracked up to be. They can`t imagine it. They just need to get out there and live it to know what they`ve lost.
Keep cool. Keep having your fun. Keep your changes for you. But you may not even want to keep your new self for your H and that`s YOUR decision. Knowing how smart you are, reading how motivated you are I KNOW you will have a fun life ahead with or without this man.
Unfortunately, he may not fare so well.
You say "I see a marriage that is retriveable and could be fantastic again, but someone hell bent on a road away from that, who is very very unhappy and blames me for everything wrong in his life, without understanding."
This sounds uncannily like my H. They may never wake up. Or when they do, it may be too late. Meanwhile you`ll be well on into the next chapter of your life.
Keep digging in to you SR. Keep out of his moods, don`t watch for his reactions.YOU are wonderful, smart, fantastic, committed,sociable, good fun, a great Mum and wife.
