P17, I would not recommend that you engage her in any way. Keep in mind that NC is for your own benefit, giving you the strength to move on with your life or at least function normally. It appears to me that W's reaction to your mother's illness has been less than what you hoped. This has bothered you. So it would seem illogical to break NC, which is designed to build yourself up, when you most likely will get the same annoyed response that you've been getting for the past few days. My suggestion would be to accept that she will not respond in a proper manner and find other ways to grieve. You are compounding your grief over your mother by adding your grief over W's reaction. Please do not allow your subconscious mind to use the unfortunate situation with your mother as a way to try and reconcile the marriage. Like I said before, ignore W, and focus on your mother and daughter, and make them the focus of your life. I promise you that you will make it.
