Without a doubt you can push her farther away. Sometimes even things with the purest intent of just be friendly can push her farther away. That is why doing what she asks, giving space, actually works for you. I am not saying be impolite or cold...but more like a you would treat a casual friend. As for her acknowledging anything....don't hold your breathe. It just doesn't happen very often if at all.
I would disagree with excelling out of the house being harder. I am home with my wife and there isn't the opportunity to slip. Even the smallest slip is right there in front of her. With you out of the house she doesn't see the big breakdowns, etc that would remind her of the damage she is doing (which isn't good at all for rebuilding a relationship). Your interactions are more limited and the mental strain is less on you. The other big one that can happen...is that you don't see her going out to be with others right in front of you. I could go on and on......but I think you have the picture.
As far as acting like it is nothing...let me paint you a picture. Go into a bar with two friends. One very loud, cocky, and chasing every piece of tail in sight. The other quiet and confident. Who do you think walks out of the bar with the hottest woman in there?
