Your w is deep in the emotional fog of her A. Your sitch is where mine was 10 months ago. I am not an expert here, but I recommend following the advice of Puppy Dog Tails and Gucci Loafer.
Seek them out.
It comes down to:
- Expose the A - Set strong boundries - Tough Love
I feel for you. I know what your situation feels like.
Me 42, W 39, S8, S6, S2 M 11y, A & ILYBNILWY 11/08 Walking away from a bad situation.