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Wow, she said "she wished he'd die". How can a parent not respond to that?

Originally Posted By: Sad Girl

Sadly, they really aren't missing out on much. He is.


Sounds like he has no idea what he missing. I just don't get these people.


M:42|W:40|D:17|S:13|Bomb:10/23/09
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Quote:
I just don't get these people.


here lies one of the keys to DBing. When you understand your WAS then you can connect with them.

Why do they avoid their kids?

Why blow-up the family?

Why do they spout "script"?

Why do they stay in the "fog"?

Why do they do any of it?

Do you think this is what they planned when they married you?

You might not agree with what they are doing but seek to understand why. Validating someones else's POV is a powerful tool in breaking down walls.

Cheers


M22,H45,W45 S21/18D12
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Well, he just sent me a metric $hit ton of R spewage.

He wants to file a marital settlement agreement and we both just agree to all the details. My only response was that I wanted to have a lawyer.

He then fires back...the fact that you want a lawyer speaks volumes about your intent to rake me over the coals.

I ignored all of it. Now he is REALLY MAD.

I know, I know... who cares if he's mad.

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Originally Posted By: Sad Girl
He then fires back...the fact that you want a lawyer speaks volumes about your intent to rake me over the coals.

I ignored all of it. Now he is REALLY MAD.

I know, I know... who cares if he's mad.


Pretty much. The fact that he doesn't want you to have a lawyer speaks of his intent to rake you over the coals.

You just need to make sure that you understand your rights in all of this; that's all he needs to hear from you.

Good luck.


Me: 44, Wife: 39
M: 17 years T: 20 years
Bomb on 08/25/09
1/13/10: MC started
1/28/10, 2/8/10: More bombs
8/28/10: Wife moved out
No talk of D, no movement

"Every day is another chance to get it right."
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Originally Posted By: TrentC

Pretty much. The fact that he doesn't want you to have a lawyer speaks of his intent to rake you over the coals.


I hadn't thought of it that way.

He emailed me again and said he was dropping off a MSA for me to review and sign. If I don't respond in the allowed time, he will file for a contested D.

Joy!

Last edited by Sad Girl; 11/25/09 05:17 PM.
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Alllllrighty, he just sent me a preliminary copy of his MSA he drew up from a form online.

He cut me out of his retirement, no medical insurance, even though I am entitled to it for 3 years, I can't even remember the rest of the bull$hit that as in it.

Oh, no spousal support.

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Originally Posted By: Sad Girl
Alllllrighty, he just sent me a preliminary copy of his MSA he drew up from a form online.

He cut me out of his retirement, no medical insurance, even though I am entitled to it for 3 years, I can't even remember the rest of the bull$hit that as in it.

Oh, no spousal support.


Surprise, surprise.

If he calls or emails to follow up, your response is "I received your MSA, and I'll be going over it with my attorney at the earliest opportunity."


Me: 44, Wife: 39
M: 17 years T: 20 years
Bomb on 08/25/09
1/13/10: MC started
1/28/10, 2/8/10: More bombs
8/28/10: Wife moved out
No talk of D, no movement

"Every day is another chance to get it right."
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Okay, thanks Trent. My gut reaction is to lay into him right now.

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Originally Posted By: Sad Girl
Okay, thanks Trent. My gut reaction is to lay into him right now.


Yeah, the only response you give him regarding the MSA is the above or "I'm retaining a lawyer so I can make sure my rights are protected in the divorce."


Me: 44, Wife: 39
M: 17 years T: 20 years
Bomb on 08/25/09
1/13/10: MC started
1/28/10, 2/8/10: More bombs
8/28/10: Wife moved out
No talk of D, no movement

"Every day is another chance to get it right."
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Posts: 730
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I said exactly that, his response was...just remember that you made me want to leave.

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