She must be seeing a lawyer...what now?

[Awoken]

I don't know why proving alcoholism would be so tough; I tend to disagree. There are witnesses in both of your lives -- including your children -- that a court-appointed evaluator could easily determine. The BPD would take a psych evaluation, which is costly, but not THAT costly.

I'd encourage you to look up DCBHM on his thread (over on the Infidelity forum), as he is VERY sharp on the legal stuff, including the psych eval stuff.

Puppy

I read all of DCBHM's recent thread (43 pages), and skimmed his earlier threads too. Thanks again; I haven't really been looking in the other forums. His experience with the psyche eval sounds like what my L was trying to explain to me today; difficult to get W to comply, and costly due to delays. I guess no one with a history of bipolar or BPD wants to be evaluated. My W definitely has been resistant to going to therapy.

As to the alcoholism, the only people who have seen it are me and D17. W hides it pretty well from everyone else, and it doesn't appear to affect her life outside of the home. No DUI's, late to work only once.

Nonetheless, what I'm coming away with is that I need to shop for other lawyers and get other opinions. I am worried about the costs and what would happen if I ran out of money in the middle.

It's been a rough day. First day of my thanksgiving vacation; first day W is gone out of town. I planned on spending it with my kids, but both of them ended up making plans all day with their school friends which is important. I basically spent the day by myself. Late tonight, W called to talk to both kids. Before I could get out of the room, I heard S13 ask her hopefully if she "wanted to talk to dad?". Of course she told him no. My first taste of the future I suppose. I choked up and went upstairs. I didn't want to listen in anyway. I wish I could detach quicker!