I agree, I think OM's W is the way she is b/c he is a serial cheater and uses his W as his tool to get close to his next vitim. Worked good with your W, didn't it?

I think you've gone far beyond what is required of a trusting H, and if you go any farther you'll be next to having blinders on. She will continue to feed you lies as long as you choose to believe them. She is disrespecting you by thinking she can work you like putty simply by over-dosing you with a lot of sex. May be some men's way to go, but I think it is a low shot. She's using that as a means of distracting you and to make you think things are fine in your own M so you'll stop suspecting OM. I'd dare say that they cheated before the bread & breakfast trip you financed.

The next thing you have to do is decide if you want to keep her for your W or not. I know it's rough to think about another M failing, but it may happen again unless things are turned around rather quickly. Don't know why OM's W has not kicked him to the curb yet....but bet there is a reason other than pure love.

Think about what your boundaries will be. Puppy can help you with boundary setting where WW are concerned. He can even tell you how to word some of those things to your W. But we all will be here to try to encourage you on.

BTW, what does this mean?
Quote:
she is a @34!

It is not about what you feel should work in your M. It is about doing the work that gets the right results. Do what works!