The day after Thanksgiving, I'd be all ready to go do the tree thing and see if he says anything about it. And ask yourself how you feel about having him along. Would you feel awkward? Happy for the kids? Wishing he were on another continent?
To answer your questions, I think I would feel a little awkward at first but would put my best acting as if game face on. I would be definitely be happy for the kids. They would also love it. As for wishing he were on another continent, I have moved past this and feel no anger towards him. Okay so maybe just a little anger at times, but it is something that I no longer wear on my sleeve.
I think I will invite H over for D's b-day. But hold off on the tree thing for now. Maybe I will just ask him on that day when he drops off the kids. Something to the effect of "Hey, later today the kids and I are going to the tree farm. Would you like to join us?" I assume he will say no, but I guess I won't know unless I ask.
BTW Gardener, I have been following your thread. Just haven't posted much as I don't feel I am in the position to offer you any advice. Just wanted you to know that your sitch, like so many others, is a nightmare to live through. And yet, day after day you stand tall. I admire that.
Me & H: 33 yrs S: 4 & 6 D: 2 M: 9 yrs ILYBNILWY: 8/09 SEPARATED: 9/09 The Beginning
