He wants to come home....HELP!

[SDFoundGirl]

PIGA~

I've been reading along but haven't posted. What you need to know is that Piecing is waaaaaaay tougher than just stopping the divorce, so be prepared. Your sitch isn't that long, so you haven't had the time to really retool your habits and work on yourself. The danger is that you both fall back into old patterns and habits, and that will just result in the same situation all over again.

You need to get clear about your boundaries and expectations for H if he moves home. What does 'working on the M' specifically look like? What are the things you are going to bring up in MC for your H to work on?

Most importantly, what is your plan to continue working on yourself? Lay it out, be specific...because if there's no plan, it won't happen.

My H never left the home, just our bedroom, and it was tough as heck. I worked on myself relentlessly through IC, 180s, and GAL. YOU WILL NEED TO CONTINUE TO DO THESE THINGS IF YOU WANT TO REALLY SAVE YOUR M.

I suggest, also, that you stay on this board as the Piecing board doesn't get much traffic and usually only people who "knew" you in Newcomers drop by. You still have a long way to go and a lot of work to do.

I'm not trying to frighten you, but I've seen firsthand bunches of people who dropped all this work and were right back to square one even a year or two down the line. It's been tough for me and my H, and it's something that we work on *daily* even 3+ years after reconciling.

SD