Can I save my marriage?

[TrentC]

It was all night, these comments like he was home with us. And he was my husband. I didn't 'react' to any of them, just let them run off my shoulder, but obviously they stuck in my mind. We both work in the morning, so he had to go, gave me another hug, wished me goodnight and left. We'll see what the week brings. Taking it one day at a time. I work all week this week, picked up some shifts, so looking forward to getting out of the house.

The fact that you are reacting in this manner shows how far you have come in the past week or so.

Stay busy, enjoy your kids. Here's a suggestion -- try to make at least one new friend this week. A co-worker, someone in your neighborhood, someone at the church (if you've started going again).

[praying_in_GA]

Britt, I agree with Trent. You sound like you are in a very healthy place right now. I know you have the strength to stay there. You are doing great!!

[motherof3]

Brit,

Sounds like you are doing great in holding your own. Just take it as it comes, one day at a time.

Mo3

[Ready2Change]

I said I need to get the xmas lights up, "don't you dare get on the roof, I'll do it this week"

Sounds like a good 180. Can you get them up before he comes to the rescue?

[Lll54]

Thanks everybody! I feel really good right now. I feel like H is no longer in this alone. I feel like I have finally stepped up to my responsibilities and taking case of myself. Everytime I do, H sees it and likes it. Which is icing on the cake. I really feel like H wants to come home. I just dont know what is going to finally make him take the leap to talk R. He talks about our future constantly so I guess its just a matter of time. I will keep on the way I am now, cause I havent felt better.

[Gnosis]

I really feel like H wants to come home.

Stop feeling like this Britt. I don't mean to discourage you because you've been doing so well lately. There is a reason why this is called a roller-coaster ride. Don't get your hopes up.

He talks about our future constantly so I guess its just a matter of time

Ignore. Ignore. Ignore.
Act "as if.." or "whatever..." << Yeah, you girls are good at that!

I just dont know what is going to finally make him take the leap to talk R.

Here's a wise piece of advice. When this happens (because it will) and he indicates that he wants to give the R another chance.. as much as it's going to feel wrong and your heart jumps and beats at 240 BPM... TURN HIM DOWN.

What!!!??!!! Did I hear you right? Are you INSANE??!!!!

Turn him down. Yes, you heard me right and NO I am not insane.

Don't make it a hard turn down like, "Over my dead body..." Nope, all you say at that point is... "I dunno. I'm not sure. Let me to think about it." Then shut up. If he wants you he will work for you. If he thinks he's about to lose you at that point, he'll work harder.

This is all in the future so be prepared for it.

[TrentC]

Thanks everybody! I feel really good right now. I feel like H is no longer in this alone. I feel like I have finally stepped up to my responsibilities and taking case of myself.

They grow up so fast... *wipes tear*

Everytime I do, H sees it and likes it. Which is icing on the cake. I really feel like H wants to come home. I just dont know what is going to finally make him take the leap to talk R.

Time.

He talks about our future constantly so I guess its just a matter of time. I will keep on the way I am now, cause I havent felt better.

Exactly.

So did you get your prescription filled? If so, how do you feel?

[TrentC]

Here's a wise piece of advice. When this happens (because it will) and he indicates that he wants to give the R another chance.. as much as it's going to feel wrong and your heart jumps and beats at 240 BPM... TURN HIM DOWN.

What!!!??!!! Did I hear you right? Are you INSANE??!!!!

Turn him down. Yes, you heard me right and NO I am not insane.

Don't make it a hard turn down like, "Over my dead body..." Nope, all you say at that point is... "I dunno. I'm not sure. Let me to think about it." Then shut up. If he wants you he will work for you. If he thinks he's about to lose you at that point, he'll work harder.

He's right.

Don't make it a hard brush-off; but definitely make him understand that he doesn't just get to walk back into the R.

[Puppy Dog Tails]

Here's a wise piece of advice. When this happens (because it will) and he indicates that he wants to give the R another chance.. as much as it's going to feel wrong and your heart jumps and beats at 240 BPM... TURN HIM DOWN.

What!!!??!!! Did I hear you right? Are you INSANE??!!!!

Turn him down. Yes, you heard me right and NO I am not insane.

Don't make it a hard turn down like, "Over my dead body..." Nope, all you say at that point is... "I dunno. I'm not sure. Let me to think about it." Then shut up. If he wants you he will work for you. If he thinks he's about to lose you at that point, he'll work harder.

This is all in the future so be prepared for it.

THIS IS PHENOMENAL, SAGE ADVICE.

"Letting them back in too easy" is probably the #2 mistake around here, after "Pursuit."

Puppy

[Lll54]

Oh dear. Its gonna in against every single bone in my body. Where do you get the courage? It wont scare him off?