Trying LRT - Please Help!

[motherof3]

Here is more to my story that I haven't yet shared.

Prior to stumbling upon DB I found a book that promotes a controlled separation and started following that concept. Basically, it suggests that if your spouse is stuck on leaving, setup a controlled separation which will give the WAS time, and ease the fears of the divorce threat for the LBS at least the time being. The books goes on to suggest that you lay out some ground rules for your separation. They are as follows.

1. Time Limits: Set a time limit of which the books suggestes anywhere from 1-6 months. H suggested 4 months, which will be up on Janruary 26, 2010.

2. Legal Counsel: Agreed that during this time limit, neither one of us will file for divorce. However, we may still contact an attorney to become informed.

3. Living Arrangements: H moved out on 9/26/09.

4. Divide Home Furnishings: Done. I didn't let him take everything that he wanted. I kept the big screend HDTV.

5. Finances: Agreed that all kid related expenses such as daycare costs would be split evenly. For the time being H will also help contribute to the van and mortgage payments. I wouldn't be able to pay all of the household bills on just my salary.

6. Children: We made arrangements as to who would get the kids and when.

7. Interpersonal Relationship: Agreed to make no contact with each other for the first 3 weeks of separation. Communication regarding the kids was to be made via email and by telephone only if an emergency arises. The three weeks were up mid-October. Now we do talk over the phone, but it is always in regards to the kids. The book also suggests to setup boundaries regarding: telephone calls to each other, helping out with household repairs, family outings, dating each other, and intimacy. We agreed to go over these items after the initial 3 week period. I never brought up these items again with H as during that 3 week silence period I found DB. He hasn't brought them up again either.

8. Dating Others: We agreed not to date others during the defined separation period. I am following this rule. But who knows about H. Can't prove or disprove either way. Still don't know if there is OW, but everyone on the boards tells me to keep my eyes open.

9. Confidentiality: We agreed to limit explanation of the details of the contract.

10. Joint Marriage Counseling: As of right now, I am the only one going to C. Early on we went to an MC, once together, each individually, and together again. The MC was obviously not pro-marriage and didn't end up helping the sitch. I found a new C.

As I said above, this "contract" was created by both H and myself. Why he agreed to it participate in this agreement? I don't know as he was very adamant about filing for divorce.

So the point of all this is that I was paying bills today and noticed a number on the cell phone bill that I didn't recognize. I googled it and found out he had called a divorce attorney back at the end of October. I wasn't surprised to find this info, but it hurts just the same. At this point H has made no mention of this to me, nor have I seen any paperwork. The phone calls that he made were only for a minute or two each. Not enough time to get any concrete info. So I am assuming that he set up an appointment to meet with a lawyer.

Now I just don't know what to do? I have put the contract on the back burner and not mentioned it to H again. Instead I will keep DBing with GALing, 180's, and Acting as if. But should I schedule an appointment with an Attny too?