It's Sunday morning and WAW was just packing up some stuff for her move out on December 1st. I stayed in our bedroom doing other things while she cleaned out drawers etc. When I moved some of my stuff to a just emptied drawer, she said "you could wait until I move". I removed a few things that I never liked in the room to make it my own space. WAW didn't like that.
This morning I also clarified what I expect as far as house access after her move out. I was actually a lot more lenient that I could/should have been, but when I told WAW that I don't want her in the house anytime I am around, don't want her to come over and clean the house and make dinner on Sundays, she really got upset. Then I told her I was definitely not taking her to my company XMAS party and that I did not want to stay in the same room as her on vacation. She got even more angry. She even said "I want to hit you now".
When I said that I'm going to need a few months or so with no contact between she and I, in order to move forward and get over her, WAW looked like she was going to kill me.
For the first time, I clearly stated boundaries and WAW really didn't like it very much. It may make the upcoming week a little rough and vacation may not be what she dreamed of, but I think a dose of reality was good for her. It also made me fully comprehend the reality that she will be gone in one week.
She said something like "you are pushing us to divorce". Later I said, "if I thought you had any intention of some day reconciling, I may be a little different, but I don't want to g through all the hurt again", so I need to do this like removing a band aid and get it over and move on.
Now, I have to stay firm and not backpedal and actually live what I said. It will be tough when deep inside all I really want is to have her here with me. I am at the most critical stage for my sanity and well being and need to be stronger than I have at any point see I returned here 3 months ago.
