7 months in but still a mess.

[LiveToLearn]

I agree! be clear be short and get the point across. I think I did that. She has been differant since.

I talked to her a couple nights ago and she said "That is where I want to get to."

I have not been pressuring her or giving her suggestions but listening to her. I think this is working. She is so confused, I need to be consistant.

She is using me as a friend and I know that. Sometimes I feel she is getting her cake and eating it too. At other times I feel like I am building my half of the bridge. The bridge that will eventually bring us back together.

She does small things also, I would not do this if it was one sided and I have told her that.

We still talk almost daily even if it is just for a minute or two while I tell my daughter good night.

She is a wonderfull person and is just really confused the fog of the affair is fading and she is unsure what the fallout from that is.

Any advice on how to proceed with her as she just starts to see the damage she has caused and is trying to decide if cleaning up the mess is worth it.

So far I have had slow steady success, and I believe that if we keep this path that we have a 50/50 chance and that is not all bad. Not as good as I would like and I am always willing to try something new but I also want to keep with what is working.

We have come a long way in the last 3 weeks.