Longtime coming...

[Awoken]

The Psychiatrists DSM IV no longer even recognizes alcoholic or alcoholism anymore. Dependence? Sure. Abuse? Yep. But Alcoholism a stand-alone life-long disease/diagnosis? Nope. Doesn't exist.

Sorry for rambling. I've explained my success through Rational Recovery and counseling before, but refrained from "going off" on AA/Al-Anon. God Bless the 5% that have been helped by AA. God Bless, also, the statistically proven 74% who quit successfully for life on their own! The most successful approach of them all.

Approach it with a healthy skepticism, this AA and Al-Anon and see how many people or their loved ones have been working the program for years and keep "relapsing" but that's okay because "it's expected; it's part of their disease."This is success? This is healthy? I think not.

Sorry, getting off soapbox, now.

Thanks so much Gardner,

After your earlier post recommending "Rational Recovery", I ordered a copy at my bookstore; it's still not here yet.
Monday, I read through a copy at another bookstore, and found it useful, especially the part about "enablers/suckers".

I don't drink much at all, almost never, and I now see that I've been ignoring her drinking problem and I don't understand it very well. I also need to understand better what's going on with W, so I don't PANIC, like I did earlier this week. I'm sure she uses the alcohol to self medicate her BPD; it's a long term pattern. How do you think that fits with AVRT/Rational Recovery?

I'm hoping to find some others with similar sitch's at the Al-anon meetings to extend my support group and work on myself being stronger. I've only been to one meeting so far. They talked about the 12 steps for literally about 2 minutes, said the serenity prayer. The rest of the time was spent with each person sharing what they had dealt with that week with their "qualifier", or person that abuses alcohol. The focus was supposed to be not on how to help the abuser, but how to work on oneself. It seemed very DB'ish. Afterwards, several people came up to talk with me and offer their phone numbers as support. They stressed going to different meetings and finding the right group of people for support.
I'll keep an open-mind, and some healthy skepticism.

thank you again for being here.