Not Me...Ever part 2

[TrentC]

Perfect - Thank you very much Trent!

You're welcome -- others can feel free to make copies of it, too.

[Gardener]

No, I'm going to get my ass in gear so fast my funk will be eating my dust. I've had (allowed myself?) far too many of these days this year and more and more I'm starting to say, "What? No, no, no. I'm not doing this to myself again today!"

[quote=Serenity13]Now stop moping and go get your ears lowered [/qoute]

yesmaamloggingoffbye

[Serenity13]

(((Puppy)))

It sucks and well quite frankly I don't like it.

However I accept it for the time being.

I do think that "dark" is where you need to be right now, as difficult as that can be on some days.

I learn something new everyday about myself and for that alone I wouldn't change the circumstance.

I am learning to help others based on the most soul-shattering experience of my life and that my friend is quite frankly awesome.

For me to be able to put aside my hurt, pain, anger, despair etc...And help just one person well that is a reward I never thought would come out of this situation and I am thankful for the chance to make a difference.

[brownidmom]

Serenity, All this is what makes you so special. Not everyone recognizes the positives that come out of these very unfortunate circumstances.

I learn something new everyday about myself and for that alone I wouldn't change the circumstance.

I am learning to help others based on the most soul-shattering experience of my life and that my friend is quite frankly awesome.

For me to be able to put aside my hurt, pain, anger, despair etc...And help just one person well that is a reward I never thought would come out of this situation and I am thankful for the chance to make a difference.

I still choose to believe that we are doing what we need to do and are where we are supposed to be.

If ya didn't already, checked out Rocked's thread and what she said to her H last night. THE BEST!!!

bim

[TrentC]

I found a place to upload the 4 x3 layout PDF:

Download Serenity Prayer 12-card Layout PDF @ PDFCast.org

Doh! I just realized that it's an 8-card layout instead of 12-card layout. I guess I can't count that early in my day...

[Serenity13]

Trent ~ No problem at all. I have the copy and I love that I can keep it in my wallet.

BIM ~ Trying to stay positive is a real challenge at times but you are right - We are where we are supposed to be.
Gotta go check on Rocked and see what is up over there...

Journal/Vent ~
As I was putting the little one to bed tonight, I got to thinking and I realized what has been bothering me lately...

I see the new people come here and read the sitchs they are in, I read the people who have been here from when I joined and I read the archives of the people I hear from and it dawned on me...

I am mad that my H left the way he did...

I have yet to see a sitch where someone came home from work and their spouse had packed up and moved while they were at work. Leaving behind no note, no phone call while their son slept in the next room...

Just a text 7 hours later saying they weren't coming home.

I see spouses leaving all the time here however they give some kind of semi warning.

I don't understand how after 22 years together, I barely warranted a text message...

I didn't have a chance to fight, I didn't have a chance to let him see any of the changes (I know they aren't for him, I am just saying), I didn't have a chance to 180 him...

And now he has the balls to go dark on me?

WTH?

No worries, not cutting just venting

[Gardener]

Trent ~ No problem at all. I have the copy and I love that I can keep it in my wallet.

BIM ~ Trying to stay positive is a real challenge at times but you are right - We are where we are supposed to be.
Gotta go check on Rocked and see what is up over there...

Journal/Vent ~
As I was putting the little one to bed tonight, I got to thinking and I realized what has been bothering me lately...

I see the new people come here and read the sitchs they are in, I read the people who have been here from when I joined and I read the archives of the people I hear from and it dawned on me...

I am mad that my H left the way he did..Good. About time. Anger is one of the stages that we must go through - and in my case,I even had a few good screaming-in-the-car anger rages at God. We're allowed to, you know. Besides, He understands.

I have yet to see a sitch where someone came home from work and their spouse had packed up and moved while they were at work. Leaving behind no note, no phone call while their son slept in the next room...Coward

Just a text 7 hours later saying they weren't coming home.Heartless coward.

I see spouses leaving all the time here however they give some kind of semi warning. Yeah, though small comfort it is, I assure you. Still, I understand your point...and your anger.

I don't understand how after 22 years together, I barely warranted a text message...You warranted much more to be sure. He couldn't summon up anything more than that because he doesn't have it within him. That and cowardice. And guilt

I didn't have a chance to fight, I didn't have a chance to let him see any of the changes (I know they aren't for him, I am just saying), I didn't have a chance to 180 him...Yeah, but you might have used that "chance" to do all the wrong things we semi-warned have done: plead, cry, beg, ILY and push him out the door anyway. Do your 180s and GAL for you. You know this. If he doesn't see it directly, he'll get intel reports from the field.

And now he has the balls to go dark on me? From my perspective, he has no balls. It's probably cowardly, guilty darkness with some other less-than-admirable traits thrown in.

Go/stay dark on him. Out of strength and dignity.

Now, repeat after me: "Finish this day and be done with it,
You have done what you could....."

No worries, not cutting just venting Great!

Goodnight and (((Serenity)))

[Lll54]

I learn something new everyday about myself and for that alone I wouldn't change the circumstance.

I am learning to help others based on the most soul-shattering experience of my life and that my friend is quite frankly awesome.

For me to be able to put aside my hurt, pain, anger, despair etc...And help just one person well that is a reward I never thought would come out of this situation and I am thankful for the chance to make a difference.

I feel the same way. I have had a few friends tell me lately that their marriages have gotten better since my separation. They have used my situation to work on their own marriages and I guess in a way I'm glad for that. Ya it sucks that my marriage is going down the tubes, but hey, If it helped somebody else out in the long run, then that's a bonus I guess.

[Serenity13]

(((Gardener)))

All I have today is Thank You for all that.

I am tired today, physically, emotionally and mentally and it seems after doing some digging on my part that my H has been lying to me all along and him and that bitch are in fact living together - I don't even know how to begin to process this friggen information. I apologize for my language.

He can shack up with her yet can't take care of his own children. Today is payday (for him) and he left me with - ELEVEN whole dollars for 2 weeks...He got to the bank before I did and took almost everything.

I just plain hurt right now.

[TrentC]

(((Serenity13)))

I'm sorry that you had to find all this out the hard way.

And the money thing is totally inexcusable. What in the hell is he thinking?

You currently have custody of the kids, right? Is he just going to let his kids starve? Especially with Thanksgiving coming up?