Is this the end of my marriage?

[newmama]

I contacted one of her friends today to ask if they would call me. Haven't heard yet. Part of the NC plan was speak to 2-3 friends and just let them know that I love W but I need to move on and would they look out for her as I am not going to be around anymore. I will see how things go with this friend and if it goes well will contact the other 2 and do the same. That will be about as far as it goes as I don't want to make things awkward or look like I'm being vindictive. I just want to be loving, caring but determined and resigned to the fact that I need to move on without W.

P, I don't think you need to talk to more than one of her friends...you know women; you tell one and the group will know about it by the end of the day! I just think it will come across as needy instead of confident.

All of my friends now know that I do NOT want to know anymore about anything they hear about them. The only thing I want to hear is if he leaves. One of my friends said yesterday that they saw him and he looks very tall and handsome ... WTF kind of thing is that to say to me??!?

But the OM sounds like a complete Loser with a capital L! Seriously!!! Who cares if he looked like George Clooney! However I know what you mean about thoughtless comments made byfriends--the things my friends have said to me like "be careful when you start dating, because pedophiles prey on single moms!" or "your H might be hanging on to the A because of all of the hot sex he's getting." (great reminder. Thanks.)

I went to where W worked today so that I could drop off a few things she gave D on Wednesday when she was over. She was working but I made sure she wasn't at her desk when I dropped the things off. I didn't want to keep them here in case she initiated contact to get them back. I thought get them out the way now.

It's good you gave them back because too many people hold on to that stuff as an excuse to see the ex again.

About secretly wanting your W to contact you today, just think back to the last time you had NC for 10 days. That desire does fade and you get stronger every day you don't contact her. To be fair, your letter did say you only want to hear from her for one of two reasons, so don't think she is not missing you if she doesn't contact you. She might be respecting your wishes!

Oh, and I have been meaning to tell you that perhaps she sounded so cold about your mum because she felt guilty not being there to support her or you. Kind of like how people get defensive when they know did something wrong but are too proud to admit it.

Are you going out with friends tonight or doing something to take your mind off of her and to celebrate your strength???