Question

[awest1217]

I know I didn't post yesterday and probably won't post as much because this trimester I am teaching two different courses (3 chemistry and 1 physics). Plus with the chemistry I am always more involved partially because that is where my focus is so not as much time to type.

I still have a pretty bad sore throat. H has been great about checking in. He didn't come over yesterday, but he constantly text to see how I was doing. My throat feels better, but it still has not improved enough to not go to a doctor so I am going to try to get an appointment for today. It feels great in the morning, but once I start teaching and mothering...it is gone, but at least a little better. I wouldn't go to the doctor if I wasn't helping my youth group at our concession stand tomorrow (being out in the cold, and talking all day...not good for the throat). So if it is something bad, I need to get it taken care of. S is feeling better. Has a runny nose, but no ear infections...YEAH

I was thinking this morning. Maybe I am wrong about the texts I read and OW hasn't moved in. It could be that she goes to H's house every night to eat dinner, but leaves to sleep at her own place. Last night there was once again late night phone calls, so maybe she went home. I thought about saying something to H, but I think that would just set us back a ton. I am just going to think positive and hope for the best. I have to take everything one step at a time and keep thinking "Don't say anything until New Year's". I really do want to see what will happen because who knows. We have Thanksgiving next week. S's tubes put in. Then if I can focus on me and S for three weeks it is our wedding anniversary. I think that is what will let me know where H is focuses. Kind of my own "thermometer" per se. Then a week later Christmas and a week later New Year's. It is scary to think that in a little over a month a lot could change for the good or bad, but I have set my own boundary that I will NOT allow this to continue to next year. There has to be some type of big step by then so I have a direction for the new year. 9 years of competition is enough.

I have to just remember...I want my M to work and I need to keep my mouth shut!