I hope this kinda helps. Gotta bit off topic. Guess I'm trying to say is that you need to re-program your mind. Don't dwell on her.
It does help (and you're speaking to The King of getting off topic, here). I think you may have inferred or, more likely, I may have implied some things erroneously. They merit clarifying and exploring further, if you're game (you are one of several whose counsel I take very seriously). But not tonight. Too late, too much foruming tonight, too many cobwebs on the eyes. I'll be back to you tomorrow or over the weekend. Thanks.
Gardener
"My soul, be satisfied with flowers, With fruit, with weeds even; but gather them In the one garden you may call your own." Cyrano deBergerac