Thanks again Saffie, You are right. This is what DB is about--I am too available. I am having trouble coming up with things I like to do--kinda pathetic. I did just join a meetup group called girlfriends over 35 that goes to wine tastings, happy hours, cooking classes-have yet to go to something with Thanksgiving coming up. I work 4 nigts pretty late and its hard to want to do something after work. Been going to a church based support group and went out for coffee after. But, H is never around and never asks what I am doing. I have gone pretty dark after hittng bottom by Monday so I am trying not to call or text but he really doesnt seem to care or have any curiousity about what I am doing. After our C on Friday, he appeared to be wavering a little and then when the A was slightly threatened by his guilt/shame -they have kicked it into overdrive--seeing each other after work more than usual. (Counselor predicted it)
I just have a really bad feeling about our M now. I need to find some ways to get these thoughts out of my head, to be more positive, to be less needy. Do you or any of the posters have any reommendations on books to read? Does anyone know much about mindfulness?
I need to GAL, be busy, enjoy my life. I know some of what to do I just have to do it.
