Going totally dark.... is this what you are saying????you make me sound pathetic......I dont ponder over him day in and day out....I only contact him out of concern ......concern that he may be alive or dead.....nothing else... this man he has become is mean and selfish ......I dont like that person very much....my daughter hasnt spoken to her dad in a very long time.....no one else had heard from him that is the only reason I emailed him.....and there was no relationship talk nothing just his heath and safety....I appreciate any advice and comments......
At this point I dont know what to change.....I never talk to him except maybe by way of email, to check and make sure he is still alive.......should I not do that?????could you explain more as to what you mean?? and no I wont have a melt down lol.....
Why are you checking on him at all? Won't the court tell you if he dies? Also, enforce the c/s absolutely. Don't put your needs for him or your desire "not to rock the boat" ahead of the money to which your children are entitled. That's not right.
I really do have a life, I do things with my family all the time....we go camping, go to movies, spend time with my girls and my son...dont know what else to do.....but I do know one thing I done want another man in my life......
Why not? B/C of the hassle of a new man, or because you are still waiting for your h? Your answer matters. I totally relate to your preference about coming & going as you please. I get that. Enjoy that as much as you can and do things you have always wanted to do that he stopped/prevented/ignored, or simply didn't do etc...your kids will let him know what fun you are having so you do not have to contact him or let him knowat all. Who cares what HE thinks about YOU being happy? This is not a contest... As far as you are concerned he made his choice. If he makes a diff choice, it's up to him to make you aware of that. DO NOT PURSUE and "checking on him" IS pursuit...and it's 100% obvious....so can you act as if he's dead to you? I mean in terms of not thinking about him anymore? Don't the kids have some contact with him? If not, he'll miss that at some point. Does any of this make sense to you? Also please don't do things 100% with your family. Invite new people into your life, or resume old friendships. You have to have some people in your life other than the kids so they don't take on responsibility for your social life and social needs. How old are they? And Your questioning him is seen as pursuit and it is, to me as well, and it reeks of someone being the exact same and hey, he has changed. So for now, whatever you do, don't be predictable. I like coming and going as I please.....just wish he was more responsible with c/s.working on that too.
"Working on that too"...means what? What's to work on? If he doesn't pay up, take him to court. Why? B/C it won't keep happening if he knows you won't put up with it and THAT would be a 180...now if some hardship is happening that prevents him from paying , then HE needs to communicate it to you. But I don't buy it. MAKE HIM TAKE RESPONSIBILITY...this is not a small thing...it's your children's mouths to feed and college to fund and clothes to buy. Why are you cutting him slack on this? I don't think it's fair to your kids and that's you not being fair as well as your h...in mho. Stand up for your kids if not for yourself. j-
M: 57 H: 60 M: 35 yrs S30,D28,D19 H off to Alaska 2006 Recon 7/07- 8/08 *2016* X = "ALASKA 2.0" GROUND HOG DAY I File D 10/16 OW DIV 2/26/2018 X marries OW 5/2016
IRMA, there isn't anything else I can add. 25yrs.Mlc just said it all. You will either take the advice, try something new, and make some changes for the better, or you will keep doing as you have done and 5 years from now we will be having the same conversation, it will not change. 25yrs. has been there, done that, and been successful. I would listen to her if I were you....
as for the child support I have gotten with the Tx Attorney generals office and filed a claim to get a court ordered c/s....what will that do if he has no job...cant get blood out of a turnip. It has been 4 or 5 months since I filed but I live in Texas and he lives in another state ......it takes sssssooooo long......thanks for your comments....and I see your point.... I really do......just got home and get me something to me......again thank you both
I dont want some one else in my life......because of the hassle....I have been married since I was 16......too much drama to find someone new......just living my life or trying to
IRMA, I told you in an earlier post about the child support issue. I will say it again. The State of Texas doesn't care if he is working or not, its his responsibility to provide for his child or children and if doesn't do it, they will put him in jail. I promise you, if he has to sit in the pokey for awhile, he will get a job! Texas doesn't play with people like that, they are pretty tough when it comes to the law.
He doesn't live in Texas........I called the Tx Atty. General to check status all that has been done was that my case had changed worker......in a month that is all they have done........ I guess I will have to wait till they are good and ready and pursue.........so how does that work?????if he doesnt live here????
They will issue a warrant for non-support to the state/city he lives in. They will arrest him and extradite him back to Texas. There is a National dead beat dad network. Texas can give you that info. Keep after it, they will move on it!
Thanks for that info.......didn't know that.....dont know how this crazy system works..but I will keep on top of it.....wish me luck.....our daughter needs so many things and I cant get them all for her......I will call them every week if I have to just to get the ball rolling....I was reading your earlier posts way back when......you sounded not as strong as you do now.......didn't get to read much was working when I looked back then you were asking AmyC lots of questions.....was interesting reading......be blessed today off to work...tgif!!!