Hi H, Thanks for asking. Yes, I met w L yesterday since H & I met a few weeks ago. I agreed to meet H (offsite - not at our house) & talk about how to "split" things up. L told me it would be OK to do this & save some L fees. Of course not everything got resolved but I have decided I don't want to keep the house, which I've been living in by myself since March, & don't really want to live there anymore either. I do want the dogs, who have been my little angels through this, while H has basically ignored them.
So my quandry is finding a place that will take 2 good-sized dogs, and will H move back to house, since he doesn't want to sell (we'd take a loss). etc., etc. My L understands well I think, that while I do not want to D, or even initiate the S agrmt, I do want to protect myself financially. And him living w OW while having full access to a joint checking savings & cr card w me is cake-eating, it has finally dawned on me! It really took a mo. to process that he moved in w her, & he still has not told me! He never will! I am 99.999% sure though. So, anyway I feel my L is looking out for my best interests & can guide me through some of these financial/property decisions.
Enough about me, back to you. I just read this on Bobbi Jo's thread, and H you should read it for a different perspective than the one I gave above. Please know that you have our support no matter what you decide to do, or when you decide to do it. We understand like no one else! I agree w Pearl that when you're ready you will know. And of course there are no guarantees of the outcome as you realize.
But I do think you are blaming yourself too much. You should never blame yourself for wanting to take back your life, especially when he knows how much you wanted to make the M work. Please take a look: http://www.divorcebusting.com/forums/ubb...nt=2&page=1
