New, my story

[ClingingToHope]

The C did suggest that I would need to write a letter to W. She said that I should only say to her that I understand what I had done in our R, and admit to the things I had done to cause pain.
I do not know if this is a good idea at this stage, any input?

I did this on my own. I actually wrote five. One after each week of a marriage rebuilders class I took through my church. The sessions really opened my eyes to the little things I did to hurt our marriage.

After the first one, she called and we had the one good talk since I've moved out. It didn't change anything though. She didn't mention D for a month and I thought perhaps we'd reached bottom and there might be a way back.

Instead, she was meeting with a lawyer and told me four weeks ago she'd be filing soon. She hasn't yet so I'm not sure what happened.

Anyway, I felt better when writing the letters. I got all of my apologies off my chest. I know she at least opened them. I spotted them tucked into a little bag in her office.

But I'm done apologizing. I did a lot of little things wrong but nothing worth ending the marriage over. That's her MLC fog taking over.

If the letter will help you -- and only you -- then write it. But it won't cure anything. Only time and space and luck will do that.