I'm 50/50 on it because he has ADHD and we made the decision not to put him on meds. We try to control with his diet and a tight schedule whenever possible. I had him in counseling for a year but didn't see much difference in his ability to control himself. He has the attention span of a peanut and gets very emotionally charged when he is having a hard time.
I have one of these ADHD little guys too. So, I understand.
The right med has helped my little man. I can respect your choice. But, I can offer some perspective on the other side - and I am NOT a big meds person.
On the emotionally charged part, and you probably know this, but a lot of these kids have a hard time getting the answer to a question from their brain to their mounth. I can't imagine how frustrating that has to be. And that's where a lot of their frustration comes from. They know they are smart (and they are), they just have a harder time showing that than a "normal" child. So, hang in there.