I saw H today. S had a basketball game tonight. I pretty much ignored H the entire time and probably came off as a little snobbish. It is hard for me to be cordial with H in face to face situations. I find it very ackward and uncomfortable. Just not ready for that I guess.
H did approach me once during the game to give me a check to help cover the house expenses. After the game I said goodbye to the kids and left. On the way home I decided that I am done wearing my wedding ring. This is a big step for me as just last week I posted on someone's thread that I was going to wear my ring until the divorce papers are signed. I will probably change my mind, but for now that is how I feel.
Someone asked me today, what was it about H that I fell in love with. So I made a list of qualities. I call it my McDreamy list. So far I have come up with 25 qualities that I feel are important in a partner. H used to display all of the items on the list. But now, I would say he only displays one or two of these directly to me. He has become a person that I no longer know. He definately is not the person I married.
How did this happen right before my eyes?
Me & H: 33 yrs S: 4 & 6 D: 2 M: 9 yrs ILYBNILWY: 8/09 SEPARATED: 9/09 The Beginning
