Hello Kittyfish & Sandi2!

[Heartbroken20]

HB20,

I get the same thing from my W. Right now, she is working on addressing me by my first name in conversations instead of "hon", which is how we have addressed each other for the last 19 + years. Apparently those terms of endearment are bad habits to break. Then again, she has her pet name/s for OM to consider also, so I can see where it could get confusing. The stupidity of it all drives me wild if I think about it too long but it does make it easier to detach.

Hang in there.

Know how that feels. Nothing like feeling like a total stranger in your own house. I don't really get it but guess I don't need to any more. She has retained her lawyer and I have retained mine. And so it begins.....

First item on the agenda: How to split the time with our girls between us. She'll be moving out as this whole thing is her idea and I will stay in our house. She wants to alternate weeks like some of her divorced friends do. I don't want our girls to feel like they don't really live at their home anymore but now have two places to have to try to make feel like home. Not sure the best way to do it.

First meeting with all parties will be after Thanksgiving (what a great holiday it will be!) so hopefully I'll figure it out by then. Still detaching so it doesn't hurt so much and trying to be cordial but business-like, as trying to be the nice guy has gotten me absolutely nowhere.

You hang in there too. Still hoping you can work things out if that's what you want. It's a lost cause as long as OM is in the picture so I hope she tires of him soon before she does any more damage. As for my M, I've given up on it despite knowing that things could have worked out if she had made any effort to do so. What a waste. BUT time to move on.....