Here, me, avermont--was always holding partner at arm's length; never pursued throughout 23 years
Why? then figure out if it is you that needs to grow and make the healthy change for yourself
Quote:
So...what is the 180 from being an aloof partner
interested, caring, engaged, passionate
You can do all of these things without pursuing and keeping yourself detached. Unconditional love with boundaries is the recipe. There is a thread on here on another forum called "true giving", look it up. No expectations when you give is key. You need to be clear about the boundaries concerning the OW.
You are being watched by your husband.
You need to look into talking to a DB coach.
I don't think you are that different. No tolerating of the OW and work on knocking out his negative feelings towards you. Make yourself the better option no matter what. I would definetely go out in town and have a blast.
Do more of what is working.
Cheers
M22,H45,W45 S21/18D12 Retain faith that you will prevail in the end, regardless of the difficulties and at the same time confront the most brutal facts of your current reality, whatever they might be.
