I am never coming back !!!!!!!!

[25yearsmlc]

At this point I dont know what to change.....I never talk to him except maybe by way of email, to check and make sure he is still alive.......should I not do that?????could you explain more as to what you mean?? and no I wont have a melt down lol.....

Why are you checking on him at all? Won't the court tell you if he dies? Also, enforce the c/s absolutely. Don't put your needs for him or your desire "not to rock the boat" ahead of the money to which your children are entitled. That's not right.

I really do have a life, I do things with my family all the time....we go camping, go to movies, spend time with my girls and my son...dont know what else to do.....but I do know one thing I done want another man in my life......

Why not? B/C of the hassle of a new man, or because you are still waiting for your h? Your answer matters. I totally relate to your preference about coming & going as you please. I get that. Enjoy that as much as you can and do things you have always wanted to do that he stopped/prevented/ignored, or simply didn't do etc...your kids will let him know what fun you are having so you do not have to contact him or let him knowat all. Who cares what HE thinks about YOU being happy? This is not a contest... As far as you are concerned he made his choice. If he makes a diff choice, it's up to him to make you aware of that. DO NOT PURSUE and "checking on him" IS pursuit...and it's 100% obvious....so can you act as if he's dead to you? I mean in terms of not thinking about him anymore? Don't the kids have some contact with him? If not, he'll miss that at some point. Does any of this make sense to you? Also please don't do things 100% with your family. Invite new people into your life, or resume old friendships. You have to have some people in your life other than the kids so they don't take on responsibility for your social life and social needs. How old are they? And Your questioning him is seen as pursuit and it is, to me as well, and it reeks of someone being the exact same and hey, he has changed. So for now, whatever you do, don't be predictable.
I like coming and going as I please.....just wish he was more responsible with c/s.working on that too.

"Working on that too"...means what? What's to work on? If he doesn't pay up, take him to court. Why? B/C it won't keep happening if he knows you won't put up with it and THAT would be a 180...now if some hardship is happening that prevents him from paying , then HE needs to communicate it to you. But I don't buy it. MAKE HIM TAKE RESPONSIBILITY...this is not a small thing...it's your children's mouths to feed and college to fund and clothes to buy. Why are you cutting him slack on this? I don't think it's fair to your kids and that's you not being fair as well as your h...in mho. Stand up for your kids if not for yourself.
j-