Hi Pearl, Thanks for checking in on me again. I hope all is well with you and BF these days! Thanks also to Coach, Lost, CG and others who have responded. I totally get what you are saying and about taking the control back. But I have to really be ready, I can't try to call his bluff. I mean, the above could happen but more likely he may just say 'ok, i see that you are now ready W, let's proceed'...and then YIKES, it really is real and no back-tracking at that point! But I guess if they would so readily go along w ending it once you've proposed it, that probably would have always been the outcome anyway, who knows?
He's starting to get deeper into his new consulting job and life won't be the glory days while it was when he was in grad school. I'd like him to feel the reality of that a bit more.
But I guess the bigger issue also - per COAch's advice above - is I don't want to be responsible for the breakup of my marriage. I fear that if I approached this an it backfired, and he's done - then I feel like I hastened it. I've got to be truly ready. He may just be waiting for me to move to realize i'm done and moving and and it's easier for him. I like the power in what COACH suggest, but yikes, it also makes me scared that that will bring about doomsday for real!!
I totally get it about taking the control back. Calling some L's this week was empowering, actually. Ugh. But gosh I don't want this D! I may not have a choice I know, but if I don't have a choice why doesn't he just push for it so I can move on? Pushing for it myself is not what I want...I know, but I am getting sick of waiting to and may have to switch gears. Fine for the next month or so since I have plenty for stuff to GAL but this has to be dealt with at some point.
Will more GALing help my sitch, or just drag-out the inevitable? That's the million $$ question, I guess.
Thanks for your ideas all above, they are great. hhh
