No, you go back to a DETACHMENT phase, and then if she ever asks you to take her back again, you do so with BOUNDARIES and CONDITIONS.
Quote:
Two days went by and she said “I will just cheat on you again.” I know this is because the OM came back into the picture for a little bit. So I know she is not really over him. She knows she should be, but is not. I again gave her space and time and was just polite.
Why??! Because it worked so well the OTHER time(s)???!
A better answer would have been: "Gee, I'm really sorry to hear you say that. That wouldn't be acceptable to me. Would you be willing to be transparent with me, and get some good marriage counseling, so we can figure out a way to make this work this time? Because I'm NOT willing to live in an open marriage, I hope you know that."
You need to take a hard look at your relationship with her, and why you seem to be willing to be crapped on, and eagerly take her back again. You sound VERY co-dependent and needy. That's not attractive, and it's not healthy.
Have you ever read "Co-Dependent No More?" You might want to start there, along with "No More Mr. Nice Guy." I don't really see your case as a DBing one, or even an Infidelity one. I think this is more about YOU, and why you don't seem to be able to stick up for your own needs and healthy boundaries.
