Coping with Bi-Polar WAW

[TrentC]

Should I just call her tonight and ask if she's still in contact with him (don't want to give away that I know her new PIN and know she's still in contact)?

Well, she doesn't seem to give a damn what you think, but I'd be surprised if she admits to it.

If she says yes, tell her to ditch him or I'll file for divorce?

If you have proof they are in contact, tell her that you know and set the boundary.