W hasn't said anything at all about OM since I told her Saturday that she had to drop all contact with him. I'm fighting myself so hard to not call right now, but I know that even if she's with him, I'd never know it or be able to prove it.
How did you tell her to break it off with OM? Was it an attempt to set a boundary? If so, did you insist on total transparency?
If you set a boundary and insisted on transparency, then you should be able to call or check as you see fit. And if she broke her word, then she faces whatever consequences you established.
If you didn't set a clear boundary -- if you told her to stay away from him just for the sake of it or out of jealousy -- you're more likely to drive her towards him because you were operating from a state of weakness. That's why she is still texting him; she doesn't care how you feel about it right now.
Me: 44, Wife: 39 M: 17 years T: 20 years Bomb on 08/25/09 1/13/10: MC started 1/28/10, 2/8/10: More bombs 8/28/10: Wife moved out No talk of D, no movement
