It has been a few months since I have posted here. Lat time I posted I was in the process of moving all my stuff from the house. All that went without incident. Still very painful to do. Still very painful to face the X. Last December I started dating a gal that I met at the fire station. One of our firefighters cousins. She has two young kids, then 3 and 5. We hit it off wonderfully. She is very supportive of me and who I am. Accepts me for the same. We have been dating every since. I also bought a house int he country in Idaho. A little mini farm to raise my sheep and garden. One of the things I miss the most from the X's house. So far I feel like I'm in heaven here. The problem I have is not being able to let go of the idea that X and I can get back together. I know this is a far shot as we are both in serious relationships, her boy friend lives with her. For some reason everything I do I try to do knowing that the way I do it would make her proud. Somehow make her see that I have changed and can be trustworthy. I thought for a while there I had "let" go. But the ideal of her and I together still lingers. My true freedom will be the day I can let go forever. For now I continue on working on myself. Still working on anger issues, depression etc. Have come a long way since last year when this all started. Hope everybody is doing well. B
