I won't email it as he can access my mail. I would rather keep it that way so he knows I am not hiding anything if he snoops my messages. If the time comes when I need a private email, I'll sign up for gmail or something.
Perfect. He will snoop.
I would not reveal any of this to anyone in your CIRCLES. Friends, family etc....Word gets around.
"What is best for my kids is best for me" Amor Fati Link to quotes: https://www.divorcebusting.com/forums/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=2879712
Has he always been so preoccupied with secrecy? Or is it something recent?
He has always been like that - especially with his computers and since he started building them himself.
This morn, I checked out his computer downstairs, the browser history was cleared but he left a page open on apartments for sale. Looks like he is making an effort to clear the history but now I wonder if he leaves it open for me to see or not. I think he trying to make a point.
So I guess I just need to wait and see if H will let his guard down so I can find some more intel regarding OW. Still having a bit of a hard time wrapping my head around this. I feel like this is just the tip of the iceberg and I am already losing weight over this and having problems sleeping.
Since I am SAHM, H has been getting on my case that "my life of luxury" is going to end and that I need to get a job. When DD2 was born, it was 'no point going back to work as the net pay after daycare really is not that much' to 'you need to get a job to help pay some of the bills (said 2 days ago)'. I can see that if I was working f/t that his guilt about leaving us high and dry would be less (if this is his plan).
Just rambling a bit... at least tonight I get to go out to my art class.
I'm in your shoes. My H mentioned it a while ago. I'm a stay at home mom just because in my career I don't make enough to put two children in daycare. So we decided I'd stay home. Now that he's gone he's asking me to get a job. Well sorry buddy, I realize if this is permanent, obviously I will need to get a job. But until then, you left me, you walked out on me. I will get a job when I'm ready thank you very much.
M: 31 H: 29 Married: 6 yrs Children : 7yr old, 5yr old, 2yr old
Separated: Sept. '09 Moved Back In for wrong reasons: Nov. 30, 09 Recomitted to our Marriage: Jan. 25, 10 Threatening to leave again: July,14
MG, Been Lurking. Was originally going to suggest Googling "Symptoms/evidence spouse is cheating" On virtually every list, towards the top of the list is: "Your gut feeling/instinct".
Bu since that seems to be the consensus now, let me offer this that I found. I know little about it, though have read through another source that what the site says is true: It works AND it may become illegal in some states this year. So, get yours today! (if you're so inclined).
Had my usual doctor appointment today (have been going weekly from jan-sep and now every 3 weeks) for my allergy injections. So I see my GP all the time. Well, today I finally caved and told him my troubles- same details as what I have written here ( it was a 50 min visit).
He figures H is depressed and that needs to be addressed first. We discussed H's family history (mental illness - mom, substance abuse -dad, depression - sis) and background, turning 40 in a couple of months and that H said he was depressed this summer. He is urging me to get H to see his own doctor about his depression. Basically he is saying that treating his depression, H will be more optimistic about MC and working on M?? (my doc is all for saving marriages if there is no abuse.) And said if he is depressed now, it will be nothing to what he will feel if we D.
So I am wondering how I should bring up the subject. Going to have to think about the best approach as I don't want to seem like I have been talking about him behind his back.
And I am still trying to determine how deeply he is involved with OW. I really don't know if I have enough forgiveness in my heart if its a PA. I guess I just have to wait and see... who knows how I feel when I get to that crossroad.
And I finally received DR and will be heading shortly to bed for a little reading.
