Question

[awest1217]

I just get so confused some times and I do want us to work. I just don't like always "pretending" everything is good when it isn't. I don't want to say it is his fault or blame him, but I also don't want to say everything is good with S and I when it isn't. We are both getting sick and if H were home, he could take care of us. If it were one of us...not a problem, but both of us is not good. I can ask my family to help, but I feel bad asking them to take off of work for me, although they would.

I think what H can do right now to show me he has really changed is call more and not text. Texting to me is so inpersonal. It is good for a quick question, but not if you want to have a conversation. If you really want to know how I am doing, call. H could invite us over to "his" house. Like I said before, I don't know if the less talking is because he really is not talking to OW or because she moved in with him. This summer when he called her less it was because she moved in. He could move home. He could ask us to do something instead of me asking. He could come over more often to show that he really wants to be with us. It is hard to see him go, but the more he is at home, maybe the less and less he will want to leave. He could tell me about the changes he has made. I don't see the changes because he does not live with me and we don't talk often. He usually texts me once a day, but that is about it. I may see him once a week, but once again that is not enough for me to see his change. I know he has changed because of last weeks nice romantic gestures. I am just so caught with the trust issue. He knows I have no trust in him because of telling OW "I Love you" while he was still at the house this last time he left. I told him he would have to completely rebuild everything so I won't tell him again because he knows, and is an intelligent person.

I just need those kind encouragements (lucky :)) to remind me that he is making progress, and I need to just be patient, stick to my boundaries, but love him too.