Is this the end of my marriage?

[LiveToLearn]

OK P17 I have been following your thread for a while my wife left about 7 months ago. We had been married for 12 years and were in the middle of an adoption when she took off. No warning, no fight.

I am learning alot and may not be qualified to answer since me and my wife are still in this. But her affair did end recently, she is starting to see life again. I have been her freind and have done lots of stuff for me.

My advice... if you want no contact. Just do not contact her. Do not answer the phone, do not reply to her emails etc. It does make you stronger and helps with the pain. You do not need to send a note, you just do it.

When you have your strength back you can make a new choice as to how you want to proceed. This gives you options and also not seem like a jerk that is trying to get attention through a letter. I am sure you are not but it could come accross that way.

Next I do not think I would go public. I am glad I did not. I talked to people when it was appropiate and mostly have just given her space and time.

She in confused and anything you do to cheat her from her experaince of figuring out life will come back to bite you.

This is my first post so take it with a grain of salt