I am the absolute worst at giving advice. I probably am completely wrong in saying this, esp. considering this is a marriage saving message board. But, considering all that is occurring, the drinking, the bipolar behavior with no meds, the probably affair, the toll this is taking on the you and the family. Would you want to file for a separation.
I probably have it all wrong and I know the experts on here will have better insight then I but this looks like it is just going to continue to spiral downward.
Priorities- you and the kids. I know separation is like abandoning you wife when she is in crisis but maybe it would be the kick in the butt to get her to take some positive action. As long as you are with her she can blame all her problems on you.
You could word it in a way as to say you would love to stay married but not with these conditions.
As a child I was actually relieved when my mother kicked my dad out of the house. It just made for a more relaxing atmosphere and not dreading what would happen next.
I mean what if you demand she leaves and she refuses. I see separation as a way to force some changes to occur.
Status quo is not an option here.
Just my 2 cents.....
M38, H37 S3, S7 Together 15 yrs Married 8 yrs Bomb July 2008 Inhouse separation "I hate you" "We are over" (too many times to count) Reconciled Sept 2009 (still worth it)
