I am struggling with going out in my town. We have worked it out that we can check in on if the other is planning to go to a particular place. For example, I could email: I want to go to Bar X on Friday. And I think he will respect that and not show up with her. He did me that courtesy for an event at the local theatre that it would have been likely for me to go.
But--and this is just my struggle, and I am still so unprepared to see them together in town--miracle it hasn't happened yet--I would have to email (but it's good--shows him I am going out) and then meet various folks, most of whom know by now but some don't--and answer "hey, where's x?' and have to say "dunno--he's gone off with OW" or whatever. I don't want to develop agoraphobia but it is so hard to imagine that I could be in the drugstore picking up my AD meds, and there she is picking up her birth control! and it could happen, it is a small town.
So--I need to take my bad self out with my friends. And if I do it in my town, then the waves of my being out there will reverberate through the universe to him. I need to come to bravery on this and stop hiding (with friends, but it has been hiding) on F/S nights.
Try try try.
Me: 44 Him: 42 Together: 23 years; never married Bomb: August 1, 2009 Affair since May 2009 Walk away; no conversation; no process
